FOUNDATIONS: 13 Cursed are Those Who Worship People

In the previous chapter you were reminded of “the woman at the well” who Jesus told: “you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now” (John 4:18). What a miserable life! What was the woman looking for? Like so many people, she was seeking her need for love in another human being. And because depending on people can be a disappointing and painful idol in your life, God warns:

Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans (Jer 17:5).

Worshipping people is the most powerful and painful idol in the world.

The greatest false god

What is by far the greatest false god in the world? The answer may surprise you. The one thing that competes for your devotion to the real God more than anything else is people. Parents, spouses, children, boyfriends, girlfriends, and Pastors can all become idols that you depend on for your security, significance, and satisfaction more than God.

Think carefully about the following warning from God:

This is what the LORD says: Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans, who rely on human strength and turn their hearts away from the LORD.

They are like stunted shrubs in the desert, with no hope for the future. They will live in the barren wilderness. . . .

But blessed are those who trust in the LORD and have made the LORD their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. (Jer 17:5-8)

God is offering you two different lives. A “cursed” life where your needs are not fulfilled like those who “live in the barren wilderness.” Or a “blessed” life where your needs are satisfied “like trees planted along a riverbank.” What is the difference? Whether you “trust,” “rely,” “hope” or have “confidence” “in mere humans,” or God, to meet your needs.

You know the pain of being disappointed and hurt by humans you depended on for acceptance and significance. You were looking for love in the wrong place like the woman at the well. Again, you were created to only be safe and satisfied with God’s perfect love. If you turn from it and seek your security and significance in another person, God warns “Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans” (Jer 17:5). Worshipping people is the most powerful and painful idol in the world.

This is why Scripture says elsewhere: “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in people” (Ps 118:8). Why would you make a god out of another person? People are so messed up! Relationships with people do more to expose your need for God, than actually meet your deepest needs.

Of course you are to love people. But when you depend on them to satisfy your deepest needs, you are worshipping them and replacing God with them. Unfortunately, you can become so desperate to have your needs met by a person that you will accept all kinds of abuse from them.

Another common and very painful form of people worship is making an idol of yourself. This happens when you believe you can meet the deepest needs of other people including your children, spouse, friends, and parents. Of course there is a God-designed stage in the life of babies when they are very dependent on their parents. But even by the time they become young boys and girls, they begin needing a relationship with God to fully meet their needs for security and significance.

Likewise, many husbands and wives believe they have the responsibility to satisfy their spouse’s deepest emotional needs for security, significance, and satisfaction. On the contrary, marriage results in a greater awareness of how much you need God! Of course the love you experience in marriage is a blessing. But only God can satisfy your spouse’s deepest needs.

God created you to need relationships. Even He lives in a Trinity. And even when Adam had a very personal relationship with God, the Creator said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Gen 2:18) and He created a companion for him. God wants you to have human companions. But God never intended any mere human to fully satisfy your emotional needs.

Not even Christian wives are to put their hope in their husbands to meet their deepest needs. The Bible says:

This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They trusted God and accepted the authority of their husbands. For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do. (1 Pet 3:4-6)

“Sarah obeyed her husband” as God desired (cf. 1 Pet 3:1; Eph 5:22; Col 3:18). But she “trusted God” for her security and significance, not her husband. And that was a good thing considering the danger Abraham put her in twice! (cf. Gen 12:10-20; 20:1-17). But God in Heaven protected Sarah even when her husband did not. Sarah treated her husband as her lord, and even loved him, but she did not put him in the place of God in her life. Sisters, as a daughter of Almighty God you already have a perfect man in your life. But He is not your earthly husband.

Likewise, Jesus only needed His Dad. Did it disappoint Him when His closest friends abandoned Him at His darkest hour? It seems so. But His Dad’s love carried Him through His trial even when humanly speaking He was all alone. And the same is true for you. This does not mean you should not have friends. But like Jesus, God needs to be your Best Friend and the One who always makes you feel secure and significant.

Why are you so tempted to depend on people more than God? Because we hate living by faith and having our closest friendship with Someone we cannot see, touch, or hear. So we seek our love, security, acceptance, significance, and happiness from flesh and blood people. But God expects us to live by faith. The Bible says: “You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him now, you trust him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy” (1 Pet 1:8). This is because your faith in the love of a God you cannot see meets all your needs.

People idolatry hurts because it feels like a person is really meeting your needs for a while. A new friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, or baby makes you feel really good. . . Until they fail to meet a need in your life. And unfortunately, because you have allowed them to take the place of God in your life as the ultimate source of meeting your needs, you may end up even hating them because of how much they hurt and disappoint you.

The false god of a girlfriend or boyfriend is especially tempting for young people. The ultimate reason this happens for Christians is because they are not finding the love they need in God. What are possible signs of this? 1) A young person becomes obsessed and attached to someone of the opposite sex, and 2) is not spiritually or financially ready to be married, or 3) does not intend to marry them. God did not intend for His children to be in a relationship where the emotional attachment gets far ahead of the real commitment because real hurt will be the result.

You can even make a false god out of your family. This is one of the most innocent looking idols because the Bible commands you to love your family. But you are not to worship them as the source of your security and significance. When you spend so much time and money on your family that you have none to give to God, then they may be an idol in your life. Jesus warned: “If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine; or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine” (Matt 10:37).

It would seem loving his wife more than God was why Adam sinned. When he saw her eat the forbidden fruit, he knew she was disobeying God. And he had a choice to make. Join his wife in her sin or remain faithful to God. He chose the love of his wife over the love of his God. You can make an idol out of any person. But God expects you to always choose to love and please Him more than any other person.

How do you know when you are worshipping a person instead of loving them? The answer is: How do you FEEL when they do not love you? How do you FEEL when they say or do something that communicates rejection or criticism? Does someone or something make you AFRAID or ANGRY?

How many women think a person or circumstance made them worry. This is a lie. No one and nothing makes you commit the sin of worry. You worry because you are not trusting God to meet all your needs. Until you take responsibility for your anxiety, instead of blaming it on other people or things, you will always find a multitude of wrong reasons to live in fear.

The most common reason you get angry at someone is that you have committed the sin of idolatry first. You are expecting something from someone that you should only be expecting from God. And when you do not get it, it hurts you, making you mad.

How many husbands have told their wives: “You make me angry.” This is a lie. No one makes you commit the sin of anger. Usually a husband gets angry with his wife because he expected her to meet a need in his life and she did not do so. If that husband never recognizes this he will always live in bondage to what other people do.

In many cases the person who is making you mad is doing their best to please you. Your parents, friends, spouse and children usually want you to be happy. But the reason even their best is not good enough for you, is that only God can be good enough for you. That is how He created you.

Freedom from such idolatry is demonstrated in Christ as He hung on the cross and said of those who crucified Him: “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). When God is your god instead of people, you can do the same no matter what people do to you.

The reason you cannot forgive someone is that they are an idol in your life. You depended on them for something they did not give to you or they took something from you. And because you continue to depend on them for it, you cannot let go of them and what they did to you. Forgiveness is trusting God to give you what someone’s sin has cost you. And you can only do that when that person ceases to be an idol in your life.

Idolatry may occur if a man is afraid of his employer because his security is in his job. If a mom is angry at her child because of poor academic performance, it may be because she is depending on this for her significance. If you feel angry, afraid, or worthless when people do not love you, then you are worshipping them. The reason you are feeling these things is that you are depending too much on them for the security, significance, and satisfaction you can only get from God’s perfect love.

Another indication that a person is an idol in your life is that you are very afraid to displease them. Their opinion of you is more important than God’s opinion. You might even pretend to be someone you are not because you think a person will like you more.

Please read the following carefully: If you live to please God, then you will please the people you are supposed to please, and you will displease the people you are supposed to displease. There are people you are supposed to displease! There are times they are expecting more than God would, and you need to say “no.” But you do not because they are an idol in your life. You depend on them more than God for your acceptance, security, and significance. But God wants the pleasure you experience from pleasing Him to be so great that you do not care about pleasing people!

This is why the Apostle Paul wrote: “Our purpose is to please God, not people” (1 Thess 2:4; cf. Gal 1:10). Solomon wrote: “Fearing people is a dangerous trap” (Prov 29:25). Never let it be said of you: “They loved human praise more than the praise of God” (John 12:43). Do you see how your fear of displeasing people can keep you from obeying Christ? If you live to please God, then you will please the people you are supposed to please, and you will displease the people you are supposed to displease.

Of course it is a great blessing if people love you like God wants them to. But what if they do not? Unfortunately, many Christians make the love and acceptance of people the foundation of their life and identity. Then when people fail them they might turn to God as a backup. But the reality of your life should be this: God is your all-sufficient Protector, Provider, Friend, and Father. God’s love for you is the foundation and “rock” of your life. If and when people love you, then it is an extra blessing to be grateful for. But if people do not love you, God still does!

David proclaimed: “Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close” (Ps 27:10). God is willing and able to replace even the love of an earthly mother or father. God is there for an abandoned child, unloved wife, disrespected husband, rejected teenager, or a neglected church member. When parents, spouses, friends, and Pastors fail you, God is still there. In fact, He was always there even while you were wrongly depending on others for love.

Determine to make God’s love the emotional “rock” of your life and Who you always depend on. He wants you to love people like He does. But God does not want you to depend on people loving you. He wants to be your first love. If you put a human being in His place, you will be committing the sin of idolatry and causing more pain in your life. God said, “Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans (Jer 17:5). People are your greatest temptation to sin in idolatry. Worshipping people is the most powerful and painful idol in the world.

Overcoming the false god of people

Christian, are you still questioning your value? Do you still feel small and insignificant at times? Then you are believing lies. Christian, do not let anyone define your value except God. Why? Because no one God will accurately recognize and adequately appreciate your true value. Only God always sees you as the chosen, purchased, forgiven son or daughter of the Most High God that you are! And anybody who thinks of you or treats you as anything less is not seeing you like God does.

Only God really knows your true significance. No one will see you like God sees you. And only God’s view of you is accurate. God (the most powerful and important Person in the Universe) chose you before the creation of the world to belong to Him. He sent His first Son to die for your sins and purchase you. God is creating a Paradise for you to live in with Him forever. So why let any mere human define your value? The only opinion that matters and is accurate is God’s.

Paul told his critics in the Corinthian church: “It matters very little how I might be evaluated by you or by any human authority” (1 Cor 4:3). He was willing to admit faults and submit to God’s evaluation. But his conscience was clear and people’s opinion of him did not affect him.

David said, “My salvation and my honor depend on God” (Ps 62:7 NIV). Christians understand they must trust God for their salvation. But do you know you can trust Him with your reputation also?

Jesus said to “the Jewish leaders” who “began harassing” Him: “Your approval means nothing to me, because I know you don’t have God’s love within you” (John 5:16, 41-42). Jesus did not need the approval or praise of people because He knew He had the love of His Dad. And He did not listen to people who did not have His Dad’s love in them.

What are you going to think, feel, and do when people want to make you feel dumb, ugly, unwanted, and afraid? It is understandable to be sad about such people. God is sad about them too. But are you going to let them define who you are and make them an idol in your life? God warns you, “Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans” (Jer 17:5). Worshipping people is the most powerful and painful idol in the world.

► Return to the beginning and answer the questions there.

► Recite Jonah 2:8 from memory.

► Memorize Jeremiah 17:5 in the translation above or another.